Country Music in Riyadh

I must confess I'm a country girl at heart. Growing up in Wyoming without access to MTV pretty much guaranteed that my music tastes run along the lines of 80s power ballads and country music. I'm also a classically trained pianist and vocalist, meaning that I do love and actually understand classical music. Despite years of traveling and living abroad, other forms of music just don't really do it for me.

(Camels in the bed of a truck are a common sight in Riyadh.)

We don't generally listen to music in the car while driving in Riyadh. For one thing, it distracts my husband because he is hypersensitive to sounds while driving. Our radio gets poor reception and the few stations we pick up aren't really conducive to easy listening. Some of the wailing and undulating tones of Arabic music don't really appeal to my western musically trained ear. Occasionally, we get brief moments of an American military channel playing country music.

(My sisters and I at a George Strait concert. George Strait is the quintessential country/western artist.)

As I said, I like country music. However listening to country music while driving through Riyadh is a surreal experience. Popular country songs today sometimes feature an almost aggressively American arrogant attitude that is almost embarrassing to listen to while driving in one of the most conservative Muslim nations in the world.

Songs like Toby Keith's Angry American come to mind. And other songs unique to the genre celebrate small-town America. Listening to songs like "Small Town USA" by Justin Moore is really incongruous to my surroundings. I almost feel a little guilty listening to that kind of music because it almost directly at odds with my current environment. An environment of which I'm keenly sensitive to and understand.

Maybe I feel the incongruity in my life because sometimes I have a hard time reconciling all the pieces of my own life. I grew up in a small town, like the quintessential town Justin Moore sings about. I know people just like he describes. But I wanted a very different life and I've had it. I've lived in three different countries in a ten-year period of time. I call New York state home and visit NYC when I can. I have traveled to many different countries. Heck, I live in the Middle East. I also have a large family which is not something you expect to drag around the world.

(Bubba J pets Bill and Bob, a team of Percheron horses my dad owns. This was taken in Wyoming in January 2013.) 

Sometimes I think we want to put each other into boxes or categories and for things to fit neatly withing those parameters. But I've got ragged edges, overlapping circles, and all sorts of parts of me that don't fit neatly anywhere. I don't think I'm the only person who doesn't fit all the categories defining people. I've stopped trying to fit into something I'm not because I don't want to be limited to one piece of me. Who I am is pretty amazing and I'm not afraid of owning it.

(My sister and I soaking up the Christmas atmosphere in NYC in December 2011.)


What parts of you feel incongruous to other aspects of your life? Do you feel like you are being categorized narrowly?

Maintenance Perks

So let's say your dishwasher breaks down, leaking water all over underneath your sink. If you own your house, you are probably cursing as you try and figure out if you'll attempt fixing it yourself or if you will call a plumber to fix it for you. If you have a landlord, you call them and hope they'll get it sorted out before dinner, which usually doesn't happen.

If my dishwasher breaks down, I make a phone call to maintenance and by the end of the day, someone usually comes over to fix it. Simple and easy. If my light bulbs burn out, I call the maintenance guys to change the bulbs. That's right, I don't even change my own light bulbs.

Last week, my dryer broke. After a phone call, the maintenance crew came around, took a look at the dryer and brought me back a new one. It's a very nice luxury to have an on-call maintenance crew. Granted, maintenance isn't always perfect. My fellow compound residents do have some stories of things not getting fixed properly or having to sit in the house for days to get things working properly.

We have a crew that keeps the trees trimmed, the grass clipped, and things generally neat outdoors. Of course, all these perks are covered by the high yearly rent that is paid once a year in one enormous lump sum.

Regardless of the hiccups, maintenance still makes my life immeasurably easier. I'm really, really going to miss them when I move back to New York.

(Pictures courtesy of my 3-year old son. Please excuse the little fingers in the frame.)

An Afternoon at a Saudi Farm

I write a monthly article for the WSB newsletter. The Women's Skills Bureau is an organization designed to help women expats within Riyadh. It is a great organization and one that I am proud to be a part of as well as  to contribute to. Our sponsor is a Saudi prince who owns a farm on the outskirts of Riyadh. Recently, the WSB gathered all those who are associated with it for a day of fun at the farm of our sponsor. My family and I attended the event and had great time networking and socializing with other families.

It was really interesting to walk around the farm and see the farming methods. The site was originally occupied by Turkish forces to oversee Arab Bedouins. They had a quarry. The quarry is now a beautiful plot of land cultivating organic vegetables.

The International Festival

My kids attend a private international school which boasts a wide and diverse student body. Luckily our school embraces that diversity with many events throughout the year. One of our favorite events is the international festival where families from the school make booths highlighting special aspects of their country. It is quite literally a feast both for the eyes and stomachs.

We had loads of fun exploring the booths, eating the food, and learning about Germany, Iraq, Bosnia, Australia, Turkey, Egypt, Lebanon, Palestine, etc.

 Lebanon has such delicious food. We love their fresh salads. It also has a very ancient culture.

 The young men here are performing a traditional dance from the Philippines. It was very energetic and fun.

 These beautiful ladies hail from Korea. They made some wonderful food and I tried kimchi for the first time.

 The German International School sent a troop of performers over to sing and give us a teaser of a circus they are preparing. The kids were amazing. They walked on these big balls, rode unicycles, and did tricks.

 The Saudis set up a gorgeous desert tent and served traditional Saudi food. I love Saudi food.

 This group of young women come from Palestine and performed a traditional Palestinian dance. They wore the most beautiful dresses and danced with loads of energy.

 Miss B got a henna tattoo in the Saudi tent.

 I got to ride a camel again. We watched the camel and horse go through security which made me giggle. How does a camel or horse pass a screening test? You can't open their trunks!

 My daughter and son rode this pretty horse.

At the American Idol booth, my husband and I dazzled the crowd (ha!) with a country number.

Bubba J Helps the Guys!

Bubba J received a yellow toolbox full of handy tools from his oldest brother for Christmas. It was his favorite present and he promptly forgot about his mountain of unopened presents and lost himself in the magical wonder of realistic tools. Bubba J carries around his toolbox religiously, eager to fix things that are broken and even things that aren't broken.

Whenever our maintenance guys come around, Bubba J grabs his toolbox and works with "the guys"-as he calls them, until they are finished. This week our dryer was replaced. Bubba J was on hand to lend his expertise and to make sure things were done right.

I really enjoy life with a little boy.

An Evening at the Ambassador's Home

A few weeks ago, my husband and I were surprised to receive an invitation from the U.S. Ambassador inviting us to attend a party on March 11 in honor of National Day at his home in Riyadh. Of course we wanted to attend. Who turns down an ambassador?

My husband and I prettied ourselves up for the big night. I think we clean up pretty well, what do you think? (Incidentally, I'm wearing the Evelyn dress from Mikarose. I bought it in January when I was in Utah. I was in the store and it called my name. Really, it said, Tiffany, you must buy this dress because you will look fabulous in it and it is a great dress to wear at nice events.)

This was the first time I've gone out for a really nice event or dinner that I didn't have to wear my abaya over pretty clothes. We drove to the Ambassador's home in the Diplomatic Quarter. The lines were busy getting through security, but I didn't mind. I'd rather be safe than sorry.

We walked into the courtyard of the Quincy House and saw three beautiful American sports cars gleaming in all their prettiness. I'm very partial to red mustangs. Once we stepped inside we followed a line of people through a hallway lined with beautiful photographs showing some lovely places in the United States like Glacier National Park in Montana, a field of flowers in Texas, a covered wagon in Nebraska, the Snake River in Idaho, a farm in Vermont. Seeing the pictures from my home country made me feel proud that I come from a beautiful place.

We went through the greeting line, shaking the hands of Ambassador Smith and his wife, Dr. Smith, as well as other members of the diplomatic corp. Then we stepped outside to enjoy the party. One of the staff showed us the way commenting with a teasing lilt in his voice that they had brought American's finest cuisine to the event. I'm sure many of the guests were delighted with MacDonald's, Pizza Hut, Dominoes, and Dairy Queen. I wasn't really impressed. Fortunately, they also offered a buffet of regional American favorites. I enjoyed the New England table with its offerings of clam chowder, crab cakes, and fish. They also had tiny whoopie pies.

While we ate, we mingled with the crowd. There were Saudi men dressed in their white thobes, with fancy formal robes thrown over the thobes. I didn't see any Saudi women with their husbands. I loved seeing the Indian couples with the women dressed in gorgeous saris. Quite a few military men were there, stiff and formal in their uniforms.

It is practically obligatory that when you start a conversation with someone new, you end up trading business cards. My husband had several made up in Arabic and English when we moved to Riyadh. I asked him what he does with all the cards he receives and he replied, "I just put them in a drawer." It made me laugh. But the cards are useful and I've used them several times.

There was a brief ceremony with Marines presenting the colors. A Miss Carter sang the National Anthem and did the best job I have heard in forever. She has a gorgeous voice and actually lets the melody and her voice do the work instead of trying to vocal gymnastics to impress the crowd. We also heard the Saudi National Anthem. Then Ambassador Smith gave a speech about building bridges between Saudi Arabia and the United States. He talked about the role that businesses play in helping create those bridges. The governor of Riyadh was there and the Ambassador joked that the governor, who used to fly fighter jets was now upgraded to the important task of solving Riyadh's traffic problems!

The rest of the Riyadh was fun. I met some really interesting people including the Saudi Minister of Foreign Affairs who takes pictures of food that he likes rather than eating it and getting fat. I'm not sure the Minister of Foreign Affairs would appreciate being called adorable, but he was really adorable. We loved the bluegrass band and the jazz duo.

Life Can Be So Very Good in Saudi Arabia

Very few people are willing to move to Saudi Arabia. It is understandable because Saudi Arabia is so very different with its harsh rules, intense heat, and restrictive environment. The people who do choose to come do so out of a variety of reasons including economic hardship (those benefit packages are pretty hard to pass up), a sense of adventure, and job opportunities. Some people hate it and live in misery for their time. Others grasp the adventure and roll with it. I feel like I'm in the latter category. In reflecting upon the last 14 months of my life in Riyadh I can say that life has been very good to me here.

Yesterday my husband, three of my children, and I attended a middle school performance of Peter Pan at the private international school my children attend. For 90 minutes a crowd of people coming from many different countries laughed at Smee, Captain Hook, the Lost Boys, and Peter Pan. We watched children from those same countries work together to create a magical performance that was simply delightful.

Today, we were at the school again celebrating dozens of different countries. We ate exotic food, admired the beauty and variety of the international costumes, watched some dazzling performances of folk dancing, and talked to interesting and intelligent people about their home countries. It was beautiful.

We live in a world fraught with violence, chaos, and war often relating to misunderstandings and greed between two clashing cultures. Racism and religious clashes rear their ugly heads to wage constant conflict at the cost of lives and peace. I often feel despair when I read the news or even ponder on the situation of many Middle Eastern countries bordering Saudi Arabia.

So perhaps you'll forgive me that I feel sentimental and hopeful when I attend events like this at an international school. On the surface, it may seem like an ordinary event. If you look deeper you'll see that both adults and children are changed by these events and interactions. My children won't ever be afraid to talk with someone dressed in traditional clothing from a different country because they've been exposed to people from all over the world. They won't be afraid of kids who have different religious beliefs because they'll remember times when they played with kids from all over the world playing cricket, four-square, or basketball at recess or think of working for months memorizing lines, learning songs and dances for a school performance.The next time I walk around New York City and see a women dressed in a hijab and modestly covered, instead of feeling shy or uncomfortable, I can smile at her and ask her where she's from. Interactions like these remove fear and misunderstanding because they create memorable connections.

I think these interactions become the building blocks for peace. When you start meaningfully interacting with people of different cultures, religions, and languages and develop friendships those differences cease to be threatening and become enlightening. My children don't spend time analyzing the differences between religious beliefs or cultural practices. All they know is that their Muslim, Indian, and Korean friends like to play sports at recess, enjoy technology, drink Orange Mirinda soda, and have families they care about. In light of those facts, those "ominous" differences seem trivial don't they?

To me these interactions and connections are the most meaningful experiences of my time abroad. I wish all people could have these experiences because I think the world would be a much better place for it.